Weddings and Funerals

I presided at a burial at the National Cemetery yesterday. It was cold! I had visited Bob a few times in the hospital and had recently given him Communion. I had met some of the family in the hospital but several others were not able to make it until the funeral. One of the people I saw at the grave site was a girl who I had known some twenty years ago. I remember her well because she was always vibrant and full of live and helped serving at Mass every week. Her mother also helped me with the Confirmation class. I almost didn't recognize her until she spoke to me and said “Hi Deacon Beckel” and I knew immediately who she was and surprisingly remembered her name. She had a papoose draped around her front in the bitterly cold weather. It was her daughter. We talked for a few minutes and would have liked to talk much longer and catch up on the years since we had seen each other but the cold prevented that. She also had to show off her newborn daughter to her cousins who she probably hadn't seen for awhile.


It was so good to see her. It made me think of the phrase when I see some of my relatives, “It seems the only time we see each other is at weddings and funerals.” That is a little bit sad but it is life. As Forest Gump said, S**t happens.” Actually, I’m grateful for those times that cause us to get together, especially weddings. It’s a joyous time where we can catch up on what has happened in our lives. Even at funerals, it is a time when family is together and reminisces about the good memories that we have. There are always good memories. It’s those memories that we hold in our hearts that keep the spirit of the person alive. On the Prairie Home Companion, (based on the area where my wife grew up) Garrison Keillor said “They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize I’m going to miss mine.”

Working in the hospital the issue of mortality faces me more than average. I see a lot of people in the twilight of their lives. Just this week, I gave Communion to a person for his last time. He died the next day. That was very special for me. We no longer call “Anointing of the Sick” “Last Rites”. The closest thing that we have to “Last Rites” is Viaticum, which means “food for the journey.” According the Rite of Viaticum it says, “The celebration of the Eucharist as Viaticum, food for the passage through death to eternal life, is the sacrament proper to the dying Christian. It is understood as the last Sacrament of Christian life.”

Too often we don’t see our relatives and friends as often we want to, but when we do it is important to remember the good memories that we have of our experiences together. When we include spiritual aspects of our time together, it is even more special.